The Gap – and my thoughts on not feeling good enough creatively
Sometimes you read, hear or watch something that you feel is a message directed straight at you, it is timely and can bring up feelings and emotions that you’ve been suppressing for a while.
Today this video turned me into a blubbering wreck – Why? Because it resonated with me profoundly. Every word made me understand why I’m often dissatisfied with the work I create, why there is that niggling (sometimes overt) feeling that I could or should be better, but scared that I’ll never get there.
The tears come not from sadness but from a sense of relief that I’m not ‘not enough’ and this is just a journey that is part of the creative experience.
The tears are cathartic and will help me let go of the expectations I put on myself, I need to embrace the process more and not be so fixated on outcomes.
In this internet world of ‘fake it till you make it’, faking it too long can make you feel fake inside, not disingenuous but just like something is lacking. I have felt like I’ve been running on a treadmill creatively for so long, but this year I’m really going to put myself out there and see where that goes.
Making safe decisions can protect you from the disappointments of rejection, but I’m now at a stage in my life where rejection doesn’t sting as much as it used to, regret hurts a lot more.
Rejection stings for only a short time, regret hurts forever.
Here’s to a year of doing and embracing The Gap…